She's Got Legs!

I have an odd gift
For my artist friend, Keltie:
Exoskeleton.

I'll be sure to take good care of it until it's in your hands!

Trippin' Out

Another road trip:
Four hours drive each way to see
A friend in Les Mis.

Sap Season

Extreme Makeover
America's Got Talent:
That's what it is now.

I was watching it tonight (shut up, there was nothing on and I was avoiding work, so I had it on while I wrote dullgloomy and this), and they've started doing the "Extreme Makeover" sob-story game every few minutes, complete with sappy music ("Some people wait a lifetime for a moment like this..." Blah, blah, blah...). Yeesh. Slap the people on stage, let them do their thing, bang the gong (oh, if only there were a gong), and send them on their way. Short, sweet, and simple. That's my recommendation.

The Sit-In

A funky new chair
Has taken up residence
In my living room.

Captive Audience

Tonight, an event:
First Official Gathering
After just three years.

Seriously. It's taken this long to have a proper get-together with more than just one or two people. Thanks to those who joined in, who complimented my stellar housekeeping (today), and who brought all kinds of tasty things to eat. The place isn't so very big, so I'll have to cycle a few others through at some point so I seem all hospitable. Ha!

Deer, Dear...

Why is it "Stagette"
When there is no female stag?
We know it's a doe.

Maybe the female version of a stag party should be a doe party? Hmmm. Work on that, would you all?

The Dangers of the Hrududu

When crossing the road
Be careful, little possum.
It may not end well.

On the way home from work tonight, I nearly killed a possum (or perhaps an opossum). Thankfully it managed to stay between my wheels (miraculously) and with not a bump wandered off the road afterwards. Yeesh. I dread the day I hit something and kill it.

One Way Or Another, I'm Gonna Find You...

One way streets, once more,
Have proven themselves to be
More pain than they're worth.

But fear not; in the end it all worked out.

Ruthless[ish]

The first box has gone
To the Value Village store;
A packrat trying.

It's tough to learn to chuck stuff! I also came across all sorts of fun nostalgia-related stuff, like things from shows I was in some time back. Those (and many other things) can be filed away, but I'm certainly working to be better at recycling, disposing, and donating.

Dig Dug

A day spent plunging
Into the fright'ning regions
Of The Digger Room.

If you know my house well, you know about The Digger Room. It's the back spare bedroom that has become a scary little storage space for ... well ... practically everything. It's a bit spooky how long it's been since some of that stuff was opened. (Of course, the basement is still worse.) The goal is to get that room organized enough to move some of the books and things onto the shelves in there from the office that is in a complete state of chaos since cleaning other rooms requires that the office-worthy stuff get dumped in there until it can get organized, too. The office simply cannot hold everything that would logically go in there, so things will be split between the two.

You Can Run ...

Tonight's scary film
Was good old Suspiria;
Silliness abounds.

Betsy and I have been putting in our ridiculous/scary movie time dutifully (last year it was the Sleepaway Camp series), and tonight's selection, Suspiria, is touted as a classic horror and, according to the quotation from Entertainment Weekly on the DVD cover, "One of the scariest movies of all time." It's such nonsense (as expected from Dario Argento), with a thin plot, absurd acting (coupled with poor dubbing of voices), and lots of attempts at "arthouse" direction and cinematography. Don't get me wrong, we enjoyed its silliness, though the score (by some band named Goblin and the director) has so much breathing and voice work that it's hard to tell what the characters are hearing (sound effects) compared with what we, the audience members, are hearing (score). Odd with some nice little moments here and there. (And the lightest and brightest blood ever.)

(I'm on a parenthetical kick tonight.)

Returning

The end of the trip --
Scuzzy hotel and ghost towns --
Finds me back at home.

Industrial Grandiose

A dubious claim
To be "Manufacturers"
Of crushed rock, I think.

Can you really be manufacturers of crushed rock? Isn't that just finding something and breaking it? Could I be a "manufacturer" of spaghetti bits if I just stomp on the box every now and then?

This was also backdated because I wasn't home yet.

Vacation Destination?

Intercourse Village
Sounds like a fun place to go
With VERY close friends.

Ha! Can you believe there’s actually a place called the Village of Intercourse in Pennsylvania? It’s even better that the town’s slogan is “Slow Down the Hurry!” Interesting that they replaced its old name, Cross Keys. The wee pamphlet gives three possible, but unconfirmed reasons for the name, all of which avoid the obvious. It also points out that the movie Witness was filmed there.

This was backdated to the time that I actually wrote it, but had no internet where I was. (See dullgloomy if you want to know what was up...)

Artistic Circle

Painting is scary.
So here is my solution:
Let the artist paint.

Today a few of us met at a full-time professional artist friend's house to do some painting with him. He got very ... um ... excited about the painting he was working on with me, and so he ended up did a lot of the work. Works for me. Best way to get an original by him on the cheap. He kept joking about what a great job I was doing and how I might start getting commissions because of it. Ha! Still, I learned a lot by working with him and watching him develop the painting. One of my big hurdles is my colour-blindness, which has traditionally made me stay far, far away from anything even remotely realistic in art. I've generally worked with more forgiving styles.

Cop Walk

Parking enforcer,
Is this what you imagined
Police work would be?

Whoops, There Goes Another Rubber...

Between yellow lines
A discarded condom lies;
Its story untold.

And the story can remain untold as far as I'm concerned! The sight of a condom in a parking lot is unwelcome at best. What, were people doing it in the back of a mini van down by the recycling bins? In the recycling bins themselves? Just smack out on the pavement? Yeesh! Scary on all counts.

The Wanderers

In a parking lot,
Please don't walk up the middle
Of an aisle like snails.

It drives me nuts! Tonight it was an oblivious young couple who strolled slowly up the centre of the parking lot aisle while we tried to get to a space. I'm not sure they ever realized we were there, despite the sound of the engine, the lights from my headlamps, and the pulsating vibes coming from our car.

How does one spell "Schweddy/Schwety"?

The Stampede has shown
That commentators can be
More boring than paste.

I saw about five minutes of the Calgary Stampede while flipping channels tonight and realized that the commentators they had on were remarkably low in energy and oomph. Remember that SNL sketch, The Delicious Dish, that was supposed to be a food show on NPR? You know, the one with Alec Baldwin? The Delicious Dish folk were energized compared with the Stampede guys.

Do a Youtube search, if you like, and enjoy The Delicious Dish all over again.

Will Power

Successful Restraint:
On a visit to Costco,
I only bought cheese.

Seriously. Not even a single DVD.

The Very Bad Deceased

To top off today,
Evil Dead: The Musical.
Ridiculous fun.

Demon-zombies. A singing moose head. A chainsaw. Lots of fake blood. Ah, an evening at the theatre!

Talk on Corners

Perhaps your front porch
Is not the best location
For prison term talk.

While walking to the mailbox today, I overheard some guys talking on their porch. Talking in tones loud enough to be heard clearly from across the road. And about what were they talking? Well, let me tell you! One guy says, "Seriously, man! I could go to prison for, like, two years. Two &^@#!*% years of my life!" Needless to say, I just didn't want to know.

Old Yelper

Watching scary films
With my friend Jasmine is fun
She makes goofy sounds.

Hot Shots

Today was a day
In which too much time was spent
Sweating profusely.

I went into work and it was awful. Thank goodness for air conditioning at home.

Kitchen Nightmare/Kitchen Dream

Cleaning the kitchen
Was a job needing doing
And it's finished now.

The kitchen got its big old overhaul today. A huge part of it was just dealing with work-related things which had ended up being stored in the room. Yes, the rest of the place needs organizing, but one room down is still an accomplishment. Ha!

Wonderlanding

A Wonderland Day
Spent with three lovely ladies
Was well worth the trip.

Fun!

Saturday's Nutshell

My day was jam-packed
With propane tanks, music,
Friends, and barbecue.

But not in that order.

Going Postal

There's a new woman
Working at the post office.
She is delightful.

Seriously. She was the most charming and lovely post office clerk you can imagine. And I have lots of things to mail, so I'm plenty happy to meet her.

Big Wheel Keep on Turning

Unusual sight,
Seeing a neighbourhood kid
On unicycle.

But that's exactly what I did see. He seemed to be about 11 or 12 and was just riding a unicycle down the road. Go figure.

Illusion

In the living room,
I started organizing.
You really can't tell.

Canada Day in a Nutshell

Dennis and June and
Diving birds and fireworks made
My Canada Day.

Yep. That about sums it up! A good time was had by all. Well, by me, anyway, and hopefully by all!